Thoughts of a Sojourner

In the coming weeks, I will begin to share about Kim’s courageous journey as she battled cancer and our experience in traveling that roller coaster journey. In this writing though, I want to just share some things we experienced and some lessons we learned during our 34 1/2 wonderful years together. Over our nearly three and half decades of wedded bliss we were able to experience so many things. We experienced times of great joy and great tragedy together and through it all our love for one another never faltered and for that I am so thankful. Of course we experienced so many things involving our girls that brought so much joy and made many memories during our marriage. From the vacations spent together as a family to being part of their extracurricular school activities, they were all filled with great memories. Our favorite vacations were those spent at the beach. Kim’s happy place was the beach. My fondest memories spent with my bride at the beach didn’t involve expensive restaurants or fancy destinations, but rather it was the hours we would spend together under an umbrella with our favorite tunes playing, eating a simple picnic lunch and reading books together just watching the ocean waves. Kim and I also loved taking short trips to places off the beaten path like to one of our favorite cabins in the woods in his of Tennessee or just a day of hitting some antique shops and grabbing lunch together. We would also spend countless hours with one another watching college football together whether it was attending in person, gathered with family & friends or just us in the comfort of our living room with a pot of her delicious chicken stew or chili. Much of the joy of our marriage was spent with our church family. Our faith as a couple was a huge part of our life. We loved attending church together and worshiping together. As a pastor, I could have never asked for a better pastor’s wife than Kim. Kim loved her church family and her church family loved her. I will never be able to repay my church family for the way they loved her especially during her multiple battles with cancer and the way they loved my family in the days following her passing. During our marriage, one of the first and greatest tragedies that we would experience together was the loss of my dad. She was a pillar of strength for me during that time. We shed a lot tears together during those days and she was my greatest source of strength other than the Lord during those days. We learned so much together about the faithfulness of our Lord through my dad’s passing. People say that you learn the most not on the mountaintops of life, but in the valleys of life and I suppose that is true to a great extent, but we also learned to appreciate the joys of the mountaintop experiences because we learned so much about the God’s faithfulness in the valleys. After Kim’s first diagnosis in October 2013 through her final days in February 2025, we learned the great lesson to appreciate the good days so much more and not to take them for granted. We learned to laugh together a lot more and bask in the blessings of each moment that God blessed us with especially during those years. Even with the valley experiences, I would define our marriage with one word – joy! Joy because we learned to love deeper with every day. We learned to appreciate even the smallest of things experienced together. We learned to laugh together more and anyone that knew Kim, knew that beaming smile (she would smile even when most people would have been down trodden or even bitter) and infectious laugh. We learned that many of the small things that stress us out were really not that big of a deal. I hear many couples bemoan having to do this or that with their spouse. Kim and I legitimately loved just being together and experiencing all of life together. Whether it was a cruise across the Gulf of Mexico (America) or a simple breakfast date at Waffle House, we treasured every moment and now I treasure them even more. Over the next couple of writings, I plan to share our experiences as a couple as we navigated multiple cancer diagnoses and ultimately the last diagnosis that we learned would likely not end with remission or a cure. As I prepare for these next few blog posts, I am approaching them with prayer because in a way it will be like reliving those moments. It will involve heartache, but also a recollection of how faithful God was to us and how deep our relationship grew because it would involve us truly living out our wedding vows that we took on that evening of August 17, 1990. As I share these upcoming posts, I will not be doing it to garner sympathy, but rather to hopefully share a glimpse into the undying love that we had for one another and hopefully encourage others that may read these post. My overarching goal in all of this is to bring glory to our God. I do ask that you pray for me over the coming days as I prepare to share these moments with the world and that I would first honor the Lord with my words and honor my precious bride.